You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
We named our party play list daddy issues
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
