The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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