He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
