if only i could text you this smell
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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