Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
