thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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