At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
