Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
