You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
