No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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