Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
