do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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