is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
