my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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