I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
