Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
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I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
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Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
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