I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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