Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(989): View more from Michigan

I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa

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(315): View more from New York

Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions

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(518): View more from New York

She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.

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(408): View more from California

Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Whatever you gave me is making me lactate

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(976): View more from

Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand

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(410): View more from Maryland

That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.

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