So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.