Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize