She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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