I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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