you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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