Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
