Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
