I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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