don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
