How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
