DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
