Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
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Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
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you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize