He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
