the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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