If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
so let's talk penis.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
