11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
