whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
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