I feel great
I just peed on a car
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
