just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
