Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
