im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
