And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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