i permit you to call me
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
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