You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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