it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I am one with the molecules
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
