hotel room ftw
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize