come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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