I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
the condom got lost in my hair
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
