that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
She has the best kind of daddy issues
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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