i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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