I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize