i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
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